


Until the Very End

by blue3ski



Category: Ouroboros (TV)
Genre: Implied/Referenced Suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-15
Updated: 2016-02-15
Packaged: 2018-05-20 19:28:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 844
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6022086
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blue3ski/pseuds/blue3ski
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It was a comfort as strong as Yuiko-sensei’s presence—the knowledge that at the end of all things, the ouroboros remained entwined.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Until the Very End

Even as his life slipped out of him in torrents, he still managed to feel a selfish twinge of joy when Ikuo chose him.

He had always been so jealous of her—her who had gradually invaded Ikuo’s space. His space. Who had slowly taken Ikuo’s devotion. Their shared devotion.

It was a comfort as strong as Yuiko-sensei’s presence—the knowledge that at the end of all things, the ouroboros remained entwined.

He couldn’t say he hadn’t tried. He had hardened his heart and done his best to push Ikuo toward a future. He positioned himself on the outside looking in as Ikuo built a family, a life outside of revenge. He tried to make sure Ikuo could still be protected and saved while he threw everything else left in his life away because there couldn’t be anything else.

Questions about life after the revenge always plunged him into despair because all he could see was loss. He had no one real in his life but Ikuo, and their purpose was the only thing that bound them. The purpose was both his savior and his killer—it gave him life, but its loss would take the only other thing that mattered.

When he told Ikuo it was over, he was talking about more than just their vengeance. He was staring into the void that had always been waiting for him, reflected in those great big eyes now filled with salt water. Even if they tried to save him—and he knew they would, because that was who they were—he had already chosen to disappear. One dragon had to break free of the cycle.

Yet in that moment, he allowed himself to nod, to be lied to, to agree to the idea of making it home with Ikuo. When he heard her arrive, he imagined that the gush of blood from his system increased because he wanted it to be over with before he had to experience the departure. When the body is in pain, the brain releases endorphins. So pain that was both physical and emotional had to produce double, right? He needed that. He wanted to at least feel like he was happy at the end. It was why he could finally show his true face to loyal Fukamachi with a smile. Why, he hoped, he would be able to almost give his blessing and pass Ikuo on to her with no bitterness.

“I’m sorry, Hibino-san.”

He wasn’t sure if he was hearing right. He was, after all, starting to feel semiconscious. Maybe it was just wishful thinking. Then, he was moving again. Nothing stopping them. Right there, that was where he felt that selfish happiness. If he was still capable of lifting his head, he might have smirked at her. It wasn’t much, she could give him that much. After all, she’d get Ikuo back once he was gone.

There was rushing in his ears as he was propped onto something semisoft, and he didn’t even know where he was. The call of “Tat-chan” was the only anchor that led him to believe he was still here. Maybe he was just lying on the ground. He didn’t really care.

Wait, there was one important thing he had to know. He had made sure to tell as many of Ikuo’s new family as he could trust. But it had to come from him. Just in case.

“Did you see it?”

No, was the response. Well, he couldn’t allow Ikuo to think the video wasn’t anything special, could he? So he prodded, trying with all the strength he had left to make Ikuo jealous that Yuiko-sensei was one of the last things he’d seen. To convince Ikuo to watch it right away, as soon as possible. Absolutely had to…

And then things went dark.

* * *

When he next opened his eyes, it was bright. Yuiko-sensei was smiling at him.

And Ikuo was right there beside him.

“Welcome home,” Yuiko-sensei told them. As though she understood what he needed, she addressed Ikuo first.

He heard for himself Ikuo’s response, finally confirmed for certain that he really was there.

And he said, “I’m home.”

When they both moved to hug her, the fullness of joy theirs at last, he kept one arm around Ikuo.

* * *

As Yuiko-sensei placed their shared plate of omurice on the table, he asked Ikuo why.

Ikuo was in the process of raising his spoon, and he looked puzzled at the question for a moment. Then he flashed that eager smile that always lit up a room, even the darkest of them.

“There’s no other way, Tat-chan. We are the ouroboros. Infinity and eternity. Where you go, I go.”

He looked at Yuiko-sensei, and her eyes were filled with softness, as though she was remembering something.

"Tat-chan! I'm hungry."

He smiled. "Fine. Geez."  
  
"Thank you for the food!" they chorused. 

Somewhere in the back of his mind, by the rushing of ocean waves, he caught a glimpse of Ikuo's lost future. As she walked away, he turned his focus back to his eternity.

**Author's Note:**

> So I just watched this awesome, awesome series and cried my eyes out at that beautifully poetic ending. Tat-chan/Ikuo is seriously one of the best bromances I have ever had the pleasure of watching, and they established it in just 10 episodes. I wrote this fic to honor that incredible relationship, and because I relate to Tat-chan's character the most, I decided to explore what his thoughts might have been in those last few moments.
> 
> Hope you all enjoyed reading this, because boy, was it cathartic for me. A bit masochistic because I had to go through the heartbreak again, but it did help channel all the feels I got.
> 
> Spread the Ouroboros love!


End file.
